23 July 2011

In Memoriam

On Thursday, July 14th 2011, my cousin, Carolyn Wilkerson Anderson, tragically lost her life in a car accident. She was a mother of five kids, a daughter, a wife, and a good friend. Whenever I saw Carolyn, around town or at the house, she always had a big smile on her face. Nothing could ever seem to get her down, and in the years I had known her, I can count on one hand the number of times I had seen her cry.

Carolyn was a strong woman. She faced many trials, and was overcoming them. Had she been given more time, she would have triumphed. She was independent and strong-willed, and stubborn as a mule. She had an indomitable spirit, unshaken by tragedy. She was a fighter, who never gave up her battles.

When I remember Carolyn, when we all remember Carolyn, we will remember her smile and her laugh. I will remember her teasing her kids, her chasing Richard around the house so we could all see his Pokemon underwear, and her laughing at us putting make up on. I will remember that she was there should we ever need a shoulder to cry on or someone to vent to.

I will see her again, one day. Until then, I'm going to live in a way to make her proud and I'm going to carry the memory of her here on Earth in my heart, forevermore.

We love you, Carolyn.

Having Faith in Yourself

I am my own worst critic. I constantly degrade myself, tell myself that I'll never be good enough, and I'm always questioning my own reasoning and intellect, questioning my motives for everything that I do. However, the entire time I'm destructively criticizing myself, I am consciously aware that the things that I'm telling myself aren't true, or that there is a reason I'm thinking the way that I am thinking. I'm a very confusing mess.

It's a good thing that I'm changing.

I've begun to realize my worth. I've begun to realize that I am worth something to someone, even if it's not myself. I am intelligent, kind, generous, forgiving, strong, independent, beautiful, and a good mother. I am learning not to place my value on wordly things. My grades/GPA do not reflect my intelligence. My submission to my husband does not mean that I'm not a strong-willed individual. My blogging and my Facebooking does not make me a bad mother.

All I've ever asked is that people accept me for who I am. I want them to not only accept me, but accept my flaws. I need them to stop hatefully criticizing me, because I'm no longer listening.

I'm starting out in a new life, in a new way. I'm turning into a businesswoman, thinking and planning out my future. I'm a mom. I'm growing and changing in different ways every day. Some won't like the change. Others may be intimidated by it. But I'm learning to love it.

And that's all that really matters.

The Chaotic Lifestyle I Lead

Here is a review of the life I have lead in the past month.

  Almost a month ago, John's biological mom ended up in the hospital. While she was there, I offered to take in his two youngest sisters, who are still under her care, so that she and her husband could focus on getting her better. Mary (14) and Hallee (12) stayed with me for a little over a week while their parents battled to make Donna (John's mom) get better (which has been successful thus far). On July 2nd, the girls went home to help start cleaning the monstrosity of mess that is their house. Mary came back home with me that night while Hallee (thankfully) stayed with her mom at her house. Mary stayed with me for another week before heading down to North Carolina to stay with her sister and her aunt. A day after she left, I left for Missouri, where I met with adversity, greed, selfishness, doubt, and criticism, all in a matter of ten days. It was good to see my grandparents and the rest of my family, though, and to hear how much Balian looks like me for a change. On Monday the 19th of July, Balian and I flew back to Roanoke and drove three and a half hours down to Raleigh, NC to pick Mary up. The next day, we drove back to Lynchburg and I was reunited with a very ecstatic furball. On Wednesday of that week I drove out to my doctor's office in Charlotte Court House (an hour away) to have bloodwork done for my liver and cholesterol. As it so happens to turn out, my doc appointment wasn't Wednesday, it had been Monday. They couldn't squeeze me in that day, so they rescheduled me for the following day (Thursday) so I drove the hour drive back disappointed and somewhat perturbed, although grateful that the photographer I'm supposed to be meeting with to mentor me had to cancel our Thursday session because of the extreme heat (she's nearly 8 months pregnant), which meant I had free time to reschedule the doctor appointment. So Thursday, I made the hour drive back to Charlotte Court House, spent an hour in the waiting room with two other patients, to be then taken back to have my blood drawn in two minutes by a nurse, not to be seen by my doctor, and then drive an hour back. I was not a happy person, and I still have not received my blood results (have to wait until Monday). Friday (yesterday) I drove out to LU campus so that I could run some errands. I met up with Donna (who had driven out to pick Mary up for the weekend, if not for the rest of the summer), grabbed a coffee, and proceeded to LUPD to pick up a decal (which are not available until the start of the semester) and to get a Flames Pass (the people in the office were at Freshmen Orientation, so that turned out void as well). Then a Walmart trip and home, where I worked on a new wreath, made stuffed shells for a lovely evening dinner in which I was joined by a very good and amazing friend. 

And in that time, I've managed to finish reading two novels, study for the American Lit Clep test, delve a little bit into the world of Literary Criticism, clean out my closet, organize all of John's notes and classwork from his four years at Emmanuel college, and entertain a 13 month old boy. Why yes, yes you may call me Superwoman.

Today has been a phenomenal day. I came up with the idea to start making and selling wreaths, was invited to co-author a book review blog (which I consider a great honor because of the level of respect I hold for the main author), finished a new wreath (one of the best ones I've made), wrote my first review for the blog, and will soon be making spaghetti for dinner. It has been the most relaxing day I've had in a month.
So if you've been wondering why I've not returned texts, emails, or Facebook messages, now you know.

Monday, I meet with the photographer for a lesson on lighting, composition, and etc. Wednesday my sister in law is coming to Lynchburg for the day, so it will be a day filled with family. And then I have almost nothing to do until the 5th of August, when I will be spending a week visiting family and friends in Georgia. Followed by the start of another semester.

If anyone asks me what I did for my summer vacation, I'm totally replying with, "I ventured to Mt. Doom to help Frodo toss the One Ring into the fiery abyss, helped crown Aragorn as King, then travelled all over Middle Earth until it was time to head home with Gandalf."

A New Business Venture

Last Christmas (I gave you my heart, but the very next day, you gave it away... And now you have that song stuck in your head.) I made my first Christmas wreath. It was an evergreen wreath that I decorated with blue and silver ornaments. It turned out really well, I received tons of compliments on it and the garland I had made to go with it, and I even had some people ask me to make some for them.

The other day, I made a wreath to hang on my front door, a traditional grapevine with orange and white flowers and an apple hanging in the center. I love making wreaths. I love the way they look, I love playing with the different colors.

I'm hoping to start making wreaths to sell to others. A wreath on your front door makes your home feel welcoming and festive. Plus, selling them gives me an excuse to make them. :D

The price is $5 plus the cost of materials (if I spent $10 on the materials, your final cost is $15). I've looked at similar wreaths at both Walmart, Etsy, and Michael's, and they mainly go for $30+, so I think the pricing I've come up with is pretty fair. I'm not looking to turn a profit, just wanting to share some of this creativity with others!

If you have something specific you want on your wreath (your name, house number, etc), let me know and I will make it for you.

I use standard grapevine wreaths, 14-18 inches. If you would like something different than that, please let me know!

Starting in October, I will be making Holiday wreaths, for both Thanksgiving and Christmas (Or Hannukah or Kwanza, whatever you prefer).
Email me with specifics if you want to order a handmade wreath (annehershman@gmail.com)!!

Wreath #1:


02 July 2011

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, it's definitley been an EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK kind of day.

Let me start by saying this past week has been a huge trial. I've taken in John's smallest sisters (14 and 12 years old). They're staying with me through the fourth while their family sorts out issues. I love both of them to death, but... Yeah... It's been a very frustrating week.

So this morning I woke up to my phone ringing, it's little notification ringtone saying I had a message or email. I checked it and saw that it was an email from Dan Pearce, founder and author of the Single Dad Laughing blog. He informed me that our photo (Long Distance Dad) had been picked as a winner in the photo contest he had been hosting! We won a portable grill!!!! That was excitement upon excitement!!

After getting everyone up, dressed, fed, and ready for a long hard day of cleaning at their house, I received another email, this one from a local photographer who has agreed to let me tag along on a few sessions and even do a one on one session!! (Check out Live Simply Photography!!) I'll be able to finally receive some constructive criticism on my own shots as well as learn from one of the top photographers in the area! So I'm super excited about that!

It's only 10:30, I still have errands to run and a house to clean, but today is looking like a brilliant day.